I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I think people are normalizing furries
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
