I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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