Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
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