Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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