I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
