do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize