She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
