i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
