I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
