Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Yo dont text me then not text me
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
