The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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