He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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