I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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