who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Randomize
