yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
ttyl tear gas
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
