I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
