We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Blood and glitter go together right?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize
