would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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