the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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