I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
