sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just gift wrapped bread.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Randomize
