Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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