dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
