I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Randomize
