Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
My butt remains clenched, sir.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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