Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
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She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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