just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
