i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
