so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I believe in your delicious
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Randomize
