And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
