There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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