What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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