It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
