One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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