What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
two words: eviction party
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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