I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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