dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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