Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize