is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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