I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
