Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize