It's Friday. Sex?
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
