Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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