I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize