i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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