Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
