You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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