1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
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