You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize