what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
